Why is Self-Awareness Important and How to Do It?

We think we know very well about ourselves.

We may think that we know what we like, what we dislike, what we are confident about, what we are not so good at, and so on.

But there are actually parts of ourselves that we don’t see or don’t yet know about.

And when we disregard them, we feel unpleasant and stressed by our judgments and behaviors, and we are even more confused because we don’t know why we are doing so.

In other words, there is a discrepancy between our “true self” and the “self-image” we think we have, and as a result, our behaviors based on our “self-image” cause our “true self” to suffer.

For example, you don’t want to be disliked by those around you, so you try not to refuse if they ask you out, but the real you is not good at places with many people, so you don’t want to go if possible.

As a result, you may end up exhausted after pretending that you enjoy, and you are worried about what to do next time you are asked to go.

If this kind of thing continues, our minds are likely to become overwhelmed.

Furthermore, there are many things that happen every day that we cannot control.

We tend to focus our attention on those things.

Especially to events that have a negative impact on us.

Though we can’t help it, we still focus on them as if there is something we can do to improve our situation.

But we still can’t do anything about it.

But there is still something we can do.

It is not about trying to change the situation, but about changing and controlling how we perceive the situation, our own thoughts and behaviors.

In order to reduce the discrepancy between the “true self” and the “self-image” and to look within yourself that you can control, it is effective to know yourself deeply and look at things objectively.

In other words, becoming more self-aware is essential in improving our mental well-being.

Self-awareness is the degree of understanding of who you are as a person: your personality, your values, your thoughts on things, your strengths and weaknesses, what you believe in, what motivates you, how you feel at any given moment, why you feel the way you do, and so on.

It is important to know yourself, but you probably rarely reflect on those things in your busy life.

You may think that you know yourself so well that you don’t bother to do so.

But as I mentioned at the beginning of this blog, there are actually quite a few things we don’t know, and if we are not aware of them, there is a great possibility that they will remain unknown forever and that they may attack us emotionally.

By learning more about ourselves, we can look at things calmly, control our feelings, and become more resilient to stress.

This is finding yourself.

And you can do it right now.

Why don’t you give it a try?

So let’s see what we can do about it.

◎Listen to people’s opinions about you.

Have you ever heard of the “Johari Window” model?

It is a model proposed by American psychologists Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham, and is used as a tool to increase self-awareness, build trustworthy relationships, and more.

According to the model, knowledge of oneself consists of four parts.

There are four windows: “Open Area = the self that both you and others know,” “Blind Spot = the self that you do not know but that others know,” “Hidden Area = the self that others do not know but that you know,” and “Unknown = the self that neither you nor others know.”

By expanding the open area in this window, you become more self-aware.

First, expand your blind spot windows, the parts of your life that others know about you.

To do this, it is important to listen openly to the people around you.

For example, “You have a kind heart,” “You are honest and can’t lie,” or ” You should work on your procrastination,” “You should listen to what your friends and family have to say about you,” and so forth.

You may hear some good things, but of course there may be times when they say negative things that you don’t want to accept.

But human beings are not perfect.

We don’t always have good points, and we tend to behave unconsciously and don’t realize it.

If you are not convinced, you may want to ask other people as well.

Listening and accepting honestly and getting to know yourself reduces the discrepancy between your “self-image” and your “true self.”

◎ Ask yourself questions.

Some of us are not sure how to reflect what kind of person we are even if we are told to do so.

If this is the case, ask yourself the following questions.

“Do you have any worries or concerns?”

“What is the most important thing for you in your interactions with others?”

“What kind of person do you want to be in the future? Do you want to stay the same?”

“What do you enjoy most in your life right now?”

“What things make you feel bad when they happen?”

“What is the most important thing in your life: family, love, work, money, or yourself? And in what order?”

“What is your strength? On the other hand, what is the one thing you don’t want people to see in you?”

Please think carefully and answer these kind of questions about yourself.

This allows you to think about things that you have not been aware of before, and it will change your behavior and confidence.

◎Create time to reflect on yourself.

You may think that you are too busy every day to take the time to do this.

However, this is a good way to learn about your feelings and thoughts, organize them, and behave better from here on out.

There is nothing to lose by making time for yourself.

Take time for yourself.

◎Think about what to do when you find out what you want to change about yourself.

Knowing yourself may make you feel uncomfortable, embarrassed, or uncomfortable in some areas.

But even if you feel that way, it is worth knowing yourself better.

If you find something you don’t like about yourself, take it as an opportunity.

It is the opportunity to think about what you can do about that area and how you can make yourself like it.

Don’t be deeply disappointed if you find out that there is something you don’t like about yourself.

In the self-awareness process, be as kind to yourself (self-compassion) as you would be to your friends and family.

Think like “there are good things about me, so there are bad things about me, too, and I can change them now.”

Knowing yourself seems easy, but it’s not that easy.

You have to accept what you don’t like, and you have to devote time to it.

And it is not enough to do it just once (although it is very meaningful to do it that one time).

Our thinking is not that simple, and our perspectives, preferences, values, etc. change with various experiences.

So it is important to do it consciously a few times and get into the habit of doing it.

Because by doing so, you won’t think it’s a bother or a hard task.

Find the self you don’t know yet and make it your vitality.